Chiku

 

It’s been a couple of years since I last wrote for this blog.

I casually checked a few short posts I had written earlier. One small note for Luna  (my beloved, heavenly-aboded cat) made me return to writing this.

So much has changed since May 2023.

I still think of Luna, but now in a more peaceful and lighter way, rather than in a sad and heavy way. Grief has softened. It no longer sits on my chest; it lingers quietly somewhere in memory.

After she was gone, I kept feeling as though I was searching for a cat again not consciously, but somewhere in my heart. My life was seeking that companionship.

And then, another cat found his way to my home.

It was a rainy evening in August 2024. A tiny kitten came running and took shelter under a car near our house. Dogs were running around, and he was frightened. He darted back and forth on the street, unsure where safety was.

My mother noticed him and asked a neighbour to help. Eventually, we brought the kitten home.

That was the day I met the most handsome little male cat - my Chiku.

He was barely 20–25 days old. Ill. Scared. Shy. Ready to attack if anyone came too close. It took me several hours to make sure he felt safe. I remember sitting patiently, speaking softly, just allowing him to adjust.

Since then, Chiku has been my constant companion.

Now he is a full-grown adult cat - naughty, playful, full of personality. He runs through the house as if he owns it. Sometimes he stares at me in a way that feels strangely knowing.

Luna will always be a part of me.

But Chiku is here, in the present - alive, mischievous, demanding attention, asking to be played with.

And perhaps that is how life works.

It doesn’t replace what we lose.

It quietly sends something new to sit beside us.

working on achievement based motivation

I have always been advised by mentors, coaches to set goals and plan activities for each day 'To-do list', and find the place, environment that motivates me to tick off the tasks on To-do list. Somehow, I just failed multiple times adopting this technique.

I also realized the way I operate on professional & personal work are contrasting. When it comes to work, I have disciplined and organized approach, a process, consistency in-built to get professional commitments completed. This approach is also observed for any professional courses I take at personal level. This approach I have adopted for financial commitments, investments or debt.

But when it comes to very personal stuff like reading a book, physical workout, sleeping and eating habits, meditation, learning guitar, writing blog, publishing poems, etc. I don't feel motivated by a To-do list. Sometimes I feel guilty and at times I simply ignore these activities. 

This led me to think what can I do get into the tasks I want to do at personal level but have been tepid on action? Honestly, thinking did not help. I got myself a 'this week board' and whatever I did do about these personal tasks each day, I would write it into sticky note & put it on to the this week board.  

This seems to be helping me. Seeing achievements in my room helps me get motivated to read a book, go for a walk, workout at home, write for blog, etc. But this is just beginning to work for me. I need few more weeks into it to register the progress.

I will not force myself into any activities, just whatever I feel like doing each day that way I would not have guilt and just be in awe of the achievement every single day.

Also, will not keep any deadline or goals to be achieved here, just do whatever activity I feel like doing.

Hope this process works for me. Sharing this as maybe it could help someone someday as well.

 

Luna

I lost my cat Luna on April 29, 2023. Every single day when i wake up, my mind looks for Luna. She used to rush towards me with joy every morning and happy to see that I am alive. Now, I keep looking everywhere with a hope to see her somewhere alive.

Her love for me and my love for her was a very different experience. I never felt this kind of love before.